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I had a Belgian boyfriend and felt shocked. Is it culture shock?
The shock was about his personal finance. He does not have more than 1000 per month to spend. Yet he spends as if he has more than enough. Every moment he has extra money (some thousand euro), he would spend in restaurants, shopping for weeks.
In my Asian culture, it is important to save money for family life. Income is just a half of a coin. Spending the money is the other half.
I was stressed about the way he managed his money - especially when I thought of a family life with him (and with our future children if any).
Is it better for me to find an Asian man?
Perfectly normal around here to spend the lot and if it all goes belly up, just expect the tax payer to pick up the tab for feeding you. That said, some countries are more like that than others and the Belgians tend to be higher savers that say, the British. Regardless, I'm sure there are Asian men who are irresponsible with their money. If you want someone responsible with money they can come in all shapes and forms.
I have to agree with MikeK13000GT.
As for finding an Asain man, well Asia is a very large continent and those who wish to spend will be from there as well.
I suggest you try to find someone whom you (can) love, of course this depends upon your desires , needs and principles.
But should you find someone to love these petty problems should be of no consequence.
Something in the tone of your enquiry does lead me to think that love is of no importance, compared to financial stability and social standing, if that is the case then keep looking.
Good Luck.
On average Belgians save more than other European citizens - and, in consequence, are actually the richest citizens in the EU.
Britons, by comparison, tend to be borrowers rather than savers, and they were even when interest rates were much higher than they are today.
If your friend has €1,000 a month 'to spend' - meaning after he has paid rent and other essentials, then he is well off. My son has a wife and son; they live comfortably without any financial problems but they have nothing like €1,000 a month after he has paid rent and other essentials.
As for suggesting that all the men from one culture save a little whilst those from another do not, it is ridiculous. It's like thinking that all the men from one culture drink heavily or gamble heavily just because some men do.
Belgians generally have a windfall waiting for them through inheritance. So, may be that's why he spends; knowing that he'll come into a lot of cash one day! Or may be it's because he knows the law and how to work around it.
If you are worried, it's the first sign that things are not going well. I would opt out!
And you can't discuss this with him and work around finding a solution (though I'm sure he will never change)?
I'm Asian and you are seriously making us look rather foolish.
Asian men? Hah!
You think all of them have a good money sense? I need to introduce you to my brother :)
If this financial situation is stressing you out then rethink your relationship.
Good luck.
It still sounds like he's just manipulating you. Poor communication, not being open about money, etc. Sounds like a narcissist. He'll be spending your money before long.
It's not a "western" or "asian" trait BTW.
Dump him and move on. Don't be a victim.
New girlfriend, J?
